Sometimes the waiting can be exquisitely bitter sweet as we try to contain our expectations and longing. The waiting can also be painful and testing.
In 2020/21 waiting for the corona virus to pass through was difficult as we realized it wasn’t going to be over quickly and that we would have to dig deep into our financial, physical and emotional reserves. This kind of waiting can be a time of building and strengthening, or determination, resolve, adaptability and keeping our nerve. But the waiting is also a hard lesson in patience.
“There is a stirring in my soul; a restless, wild anticipation.
I am staring out into the horizon, as far as I can.
I can’t see what is beyond it – but I can feel it.”Lang Lear
This collection was created during the second and third lockdowns of the Covid 19 pandemic as I reflected on the impact the waiting was having on me and those close around me. Part of it was an attempt to take me away from too many news updates, mind-travelling instead to wild spaces I had previously visited and could remember the response of being in that place. It helped me to examine my own wild space internally, bringing quiet and stability during the waves of panic, anxiety and worry. It helped me to reflect on my own response to having to wait it out, making me realize that, in fact, I had poor skills of patience and the ability to just sit with ‘today’. I would like to think I have learnt a bit more from that experience but I see some things are just a bit too in-grained and resistant.
One thing I explored in creating these paintings was using different brush techniques to lay down lusher, thicker colour, and to form shape and texture with the paint. I also had a particular focus on rendering light in different conditions and observing more of the effects of light in the painting.
Click on each image to see more of the story and reflections behind each painting.
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